Question, Persuade, Refer (QPR) is a proven suicide prevention training that provides information on the warning signs of suicide, tips to persuade someone from attempting suicide, and resources on where to refer someone with suicidal thoughts.
In our society we tend to avoid talking about suicide, largely due to helplessness, anger, stigma, and fear. Suicide is a public health problem and a leading cause of death in the United States. Fortunately, suicide is preventable. Protective factors such as community and connection, problem-solving and coping skills, good health, and positive self-esteem can all play a role in keeping people alive.
Question
QPR provides information on how to broach the subject of suicide with someone who may be struggling with those thoughts. Many of us hesitate because we don’t know how to start, or we’re afraid of what the answer might be. It’s natural and okay to feel anxious when we see a loved one in distress, but we cannot let that stop us from stepping in and asking the hard questions.
According to QPR, the best way to raise the subject is to ask a direct question and then listen to the answer with compassion. “Are you thinking about killing yourself?” can be a really difficult question to ask, but sometimes it is necessary.
Here are some tips for asking the suicide question:
- Pick a place and time to maximize privacy
- Start by expressing your concern and desire to help
- Ask them directly if they have thought about suicide
- Don’t promise to keep silent
- Stay calm if they say yes
Persuade
If the answer to your question is yes, the next step is to persuade them to stay alive. Your willingness to listen and to help can rekindle hope and make all the difference. Try asking “Will you let me help you get help?” From there, you can support them in connecting with ongoing care and establishing a safety net for those moments they find themselves in crisis.
Refer
None of us have all the answers. But as friends, family members, neighbors, and community members, we can be prepared. That’s why it’s so important to have information on services that you can refer someone to. Whether it’s a counselor, therapist, or 988 (the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline), knowledge of information and resources available truly can make the difference in someone’s life.
If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts or mental health-related distress, call or text 988 to connect with trained professionals who are ready to listen free of charge and without judgment.
Learn more about Question, Persuade, Refer workshops here.
